A modern-day Bedouin named Bubu can stand only two or three days in the city before he needs to get back to the Sahara Desert. “The city makes me feel boxed in,” he explained.
My friend Buchi is starting a new business. She told me yesterday that she recognizes when she has “hit her max” and needs to unplug for a few days to re-connect with God.
Bubu and Buchi have both spent major time in silence — a childhood in the desert and two years in a Carmelite monastery, respectively. So they know the difference between simplicity and overwhelm. We are invited to lean into the wisdom of people who have spent long years in silence because what they know is what we all need to know.
And that is that God comes first. God’s guidance animates and gives purpose to our mission, our work, and our life. Jesus put it this way: “I am the vine and you are the branches. Without me you can do nothing.” He means that without putting him first, we can do nothing of eternal value and all our efforts will die with us.
How many of us have lost the awareness, or never had it, of having hit our max? How often are we running on fumes and don’t even recognize it? Or know we feel boxed in, but aren’t sure what to do differently?
What to do?
There are some easy fixes, depending on our season of life.
Many professionals are able to go on retreat — anything from a morning, to a weekend, to several weeks. It’s amazing how much clarity we can gain in a weekend when someone else does the cooking and there is daily Mass, access to Confession, and the luxury of pondering the words of the retreat master or sinking into great spiritual reading. Or sitting with a journal before the tabernacle without having to check our emails.
Not everyone can manage a retreat — my friend Sam has had little silence in 34 years of homeschooling 14 children. She attends Mass before the kids get up and spends 15 minutes of quiet time in the morning. Sam warns her children, “Don’t talk to mommy while she’s in her prayer chair. If mommy doesn’t have her time with God, everyone’s gonna have a bad day.” She prays the Rosary sitting on the toilet lid while the kids play in the tub with their bath toys.
Sam’s day is shot through with quick prayers for friends and family, with alarms and lit candles to remind her.
What else to do?
For those of us who can afford to make time but don’t, here are three tips:
- Read and ponder almost any book by Jacques Philippe to grow your awareness of the value of quiet time.
- Discern what you’re doing that “wastes time” and allot that time to prayer.
- Schedule your quiet time as you’d schedule a lunch date with a friend. Start small and build up.
The payoff
The former Bedouin and former Carmelite keep their peace — even as they grow their businesses — because they’ve experienced how thin their mission and purpose feel without a connection with God at the forefront.
The challenge
Your challenge is to carve out time for quiet time in any way you can. If that means getting a little guidance, coaching, and encouragement, book a call with me and we’ll look to see what you next best step is to have a prayer life that really supports you and your work — so you finally know that God’s got your back: https://calendly.com/vir2connection/chat-with-rose
Sharon
Rose, thanks for this reflection. I just spent 4 days with my niece who is a pro at silence.
mary herstein
My husband is a athiest and wants the TV on all the time; especially during football season. I try to use the early morning for silence, but we have a dog now and he gets up for her.
Judith Marie Dihel
I periodically when being overwhelmed by much or taking on too many responsibilities will go on Sabbatical in my home. Unplug from devices, spend time outside, listen to music, take stock of my life, throw off anything or anyone that is a distraction, prioritize and set a realistic schedule and commitments of my time. During this period, I usually take a step back from people and rejuvenate my mind body and spirit in solitude. Thank you for this information today as I have been hit hard in all areas of my life recently and am currently and through Advent going through a period of solitude and reflection.
Jenean Jones
Rose, thank you for this reminder. Silence and quiet are so important to me. Jesus prayer brings me back to center when I’m off balance. My condo overlooks Sligo Creek so I have trees right out my balcony windows. The view takes me outside and inside simultaneously. God is ever present.
Tom Roberts
I don’t take any chances. I schedule Eucharistic Adoration on Tuesdays at my church and Contemplative Prayer Wednesday evenings also at my church. Then I make sure I show up. Years ago I had the same obligation for league bowling. This is better.
Debbie
Hi Rose,
Yes, Autumn is here and loving it!
I spend a lot of time with our Lord, but rarely in silence.
I am going to start walking again and hoping this is what I’ve been lacking.
I would like to disconnect from electronics, but all I do is faith base daily on electronics.
I thought maybe, like you and many others I will try praying my Rosarys while walking, listen to my faith base podcasts while getting fresh air and nature.
Say a prayer that I will follow through on my spiritual challenge.
As always, I enjoy your emails.
God Bless
Lucy Edwards
Thank you Rose for your prayers as I trust in the Lord to help me get by everyday.
I look forward for all your emails, enjoy everyone of them.
I m glad to know about your trips, that is great, enjoy!
Lucy Edwards
Thank you Rose for your prayers as I trust in the Lord to help me get by everyday.
I look forward for all your emails, enjoy everyone of them.
I m glad to know about your trips, that is great, enjoy!
Lucy
Ellen
Thank you, Rose. I know I am lacking in quiet time and long to take a break from the business of life. I thought when I retired I would have so much time but find that between family and volunteering I do not. I will be going on my first weekend retreat in three weeks and it is a silent retreat. There will be daily Mass, Adoration, talks and time for silent prayer. I am so looking forward to this time and your article came at a good time to reinforce the need for this.
Ellen
Diane Isabelle
Good reminders, Rose!
Btw, there is also a “Grand Canyon of the Pacific,” Waimea Canyon in Hawaii. Visited there in 1975.